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Thank you.

Marika .you are great. In one of your presentations you speak about feeling "welcome". Can not find it again

Start hanging out with people who are respectful. Easy fix. No one gets insulted too easily. The offender has lower values.

I broke up my relationship because it was not good for me. Trauma Bonded both cptsd. We were 14 years together 😢. I feel like all my hopes and dreams are shattered. I feel i have a big hole in my heart. Still hoping to get back and things will be better. In the end we were abusive to each other. I do recognise i fall for men that are a bit crazy. But it was getting way too crazy. Being mean to each other. I hope that in time i will find my flow and happiness in life again. And the red flag man exit the door immediately.

I wish everyone lots of healing in the aftermath of a breakup 🌱💖. You can find more videos to watch on this topic in my breakup playlist 👉ruclips.net/p/PLzRKYOPcN3c_Xe00PbgF5fL88D8DNZHkH and remember to subscribe, if you're new here 👉 t1p.de/2o0n

Would noise cancelling headphones be a bad or good strategy?

Great insights! I've been in conflict with myself in the last years. I have done so much that I didn't really want to do only because I was good at and for financial reasons... I've been trying to force myself to continue but all I really want is gardening, interacting with animals and to do some art work. I feel that I can't deny those pleasures to myself anymore. I'm not rich but I can live with what I already have. On the other hand, I fear I am just running away from challenges (avoiding). I fear missing opportunities and getting stuck later. I'm so used to sacrifice that it feels like I'm doing something wrong by choosing another path. It also scares me that I'm not an elder but the things I want to do sound like a retired person would aspire to 😅 Any thoughts? Thank you!

I'm very curious. about saying "there is something wrong with you" and changing it to "I am enough". what if there is genuinely a problem you have where you make people uncomfortable with anger and its a problem you want to solve? id say then that there is something wrong with that

Just broke it off he was great in the beginning but didn’t show up for me when I needed him to communicate with me The texts and calls became less and the conversation became less and I was just waiting and having anxiety waiting All my life I have this but no more, I’m choosing me and kicking him to the curb but somehow I think he will come back apologizing and fix his ways (PTSD) of all but disappearing In counseling for attachment anxiety I’m helping myself!

I'm low and lonely without her 😢😢😢 How much $$$$ do you charge for healing my broken heart 💔 😅😅

going through the hardest breakup i ever have rn, it’s been 23 hours and i can’t believe how much it hurts, it feels like the worst pain i’ve ever had. it was a mutual breakup because of long distance so that makes it harder, we still love each other but we just can’t be together.

I totally understand this but i don't really know what to do. How to make the difference between what's not appealing and what is fear and I kinda keep myself stuck or doing things i partially like because I'm scared to commit. There are so many meta emotions stuck that I'm not aware of. What i don't want is so strong that i never really noticed it wasn't what i wanted. I always thought wanting not to was a want..

please keep doing what ur doing ur helping me

Every time she mentions "Ex" it hurts just a little more

I was betrayed, long, long ago, by a dear, very, very close friend whom I considered like a little Sister to me. Over time, the initial connection on her part decreased, and decreased, and decreased, until she became completely indifferent to me and my feelings. Naturally, a time came before I lost all patience with this, and made it known to her...in no uncertain terms. That was the last time we ever spoke to each other. She simply deserted me like I was nothing. The WORST part, is that she never reached out to find out what went wrong between us, and, worst of ALL, never bothered to check up on me, simply to see if I was O.K.. A simple phone call, "Hey, I know things ended badly between us, but I just wanted to make sure you're all right. NOTHING. To ME, it's as if she didn't care, betrayed me, stabbed me in the back the first chance she got, and never looked back, not even caring whether I did something horrible or not. As far as she was concerned, in a quick moment,I had ceased to exist. The shock of it remained for MANY years. But after a long time, something in me just...changed. "She did it out of a desire to hurt me as much as possible!". ""All the time she confessed about caring so much, it was all deliberate, intentional lies to manipulate me!". "Her entire intent was to manipulate me to her advantage, and then drop me when I was no longer of use to her!". And the anger, the rage, kept getting worse, and worse, and worse. And it's STILL there; my dearest fantasy, is to strike out and hurt her, that her pain be so overwhelming, and full of agony, that she will finally understand what her evilness made me feel. And NO, don't worry, I have no desire or intent to personally do anything; sitting in a prison cell wouldn't do ME any good. To me, I simply want her to suffer the most unimaginable pain, and to know that it comes from me, and there is damned NOTHING she can do about it or relieve it. Does THAT sound evil? Does that sound mentally unstable? It very well may be. But, this happened 42 years ago. Unresolved bitterness and rage takes a mental toll on you. Try being me, and experience the most cruel and inhuman betrayal by someone so dear to you, and it never gets resolved. It's destroyed my life (her fault), and left me having to go to psychiatrist, counselors, be medicated with the highest doses of Sertraline doctors are even ALLOWED to prescribe. I have a laundry list of mental disabilities; PTSD, depression, trauma, obsessive-compulsive disorder, anxiety attacks...just for STARTERS. I lose my temper and fly off into an uncontrolled rage at the slightest thing. Everybody I know comments on how negative I am. Even typing a word here, and misspelling it, will elicit such anger and rage (though only momentarily). Should I be telling you all this personal sh*t? No. But it's necessary so you can understand where it all comes from. So, what is the point of this long, long diatribe already? I recently started seeing ANOTHER councilor. When discussing on letting go of my anger and forgiving, I told her something which she found so profound that she remembered it through the whole week, till the next weeks' session: I had told her: "I've known pain and suffering all my life. He's become like an old and close friend to me. 'We've been together so long, he's like an old friend to me.' Without him, I would be totally dumbfounded. I wouldn't be able to figure out what to do. It would be like a sudden void in my life. How could I function without him? I'd look back on my life and feel as if all those years of suffering had been for nothing'. She told me she had thought about that all week. She said "I really don't have an answer to that. You raised a really profound, insightful thought, and I really don't know how to respond". (DAMN, this is LONG. That's my problem: my stories go on for eternity.) If I abandon my grudge, after all she did to me, all my years past are rendered meaningless. She doesn't care about what she did; therefore she remains, unpunished. Living well, with no consequences for her evil actions. If I let it go, how will she pay for transgressions? It's easy (and very satisfying), to think that G*d will punish her when she leaves this Earth, but I won't be there to see it, or to know that it will absolutely happen. When you have been evilly hurt to my level, you need to know YOURSELF that G*d is dealing with the evil she wrought onto me. Am I a sick person for that? Probably. Am I obsessive? Yeah, I already covered THAT. But, then, I am a sick, obsessed person who has good REASON to feel the way I do. If you let evil get away with it, if you let it go unpunished...it feels no regret for its' actions, and continues to go on to more depraved evil.

It’s been a week since we broke up. I couldn’t go past his communication issue and he knew that I was becoming unhappy, and seeing me in that state didn’t make him happy either. He knew I didn’t have the spine to pull the trigger so he did it instead.. He’s genuinely the best guy I’ve ever being with, but circumstances and his lack of transparency towards his real thoughts on our relationship in the future didn’t help matters. I later found out that we didn’t align in the longevity of our relationship. That is; I wanted us to be long term, but he didn’t feel the same way. I still keep hoping that we’ll get to talk about all this again, someday, hoping that some day we get a second chance. But I know that the chances of that happening are little to none. I’m a mess right now.

I just don’t want love no more … you could love someone to best and they still leave … keep yo heart guarded just don’t let no other woman love you … my soul from now on is gonna reject everything that try to get close .. cause they switch up

First major relationship after my divorce and this one hurts as much. Feel like I was thrown away in the trash. It nice though reading these comments and seeing I’m not alone with the pain.

Men i do and i am in therapy for so long it's just very exhausting how trying to be normal and stay balanced is on a daily basis. I have the tools mostly like mindfulness but no life because of the effort it takes to do those skills every day to be emotionally regulated

Thank you ❤

Thank you for yuur channel ❤ i really like the informative clips. Thanks 👍 much love from Belgium

Thank you bye the way I really felt these and I get it. After years of therapy (not for my ex just life) I do see how I engage in these patrons thank you ❤

He was my best friend for years then together then he left but we were in situationship as long as we were together and even more friends then ever. Now he's dating someone and I'm nothing anymore. Not even a friend the loss is like grieving many people in my life died not old always unexpected. It feels like that but they live and choose to not see you

Thank you, that is very interesting

Thank you 🙏🏽

What are creative ways to change your narrative and lens from a first party pov? Briefly heard about journal scripting 'imagine what a better self is like in 3 months time' (unsure about this wrote down before). Also hears about IFS (diff personality characteristics as a character). Felt like the bridge modality is missing to make it appealing...(do notice sometimes am noticing current 3D problems or situations and cant do that) Can people share what works for them please? Tyvm in advance!

Thank you for doing a video for the person that ends it. 99% of RUclips videos are for the dumped not the dumper. It’s still hard!

The shame collage are like energy's stored in the body that get activated everytime it gets triggered. thank you for teaching us Doc!

I've just started to watch your videos few days ago and your content really affects my way of thinking & feeling towards myself positively.. thanks a lot!

this is the main emotion i have felt all my life and have always found it difficut to validate myself alot of it was to do with relationships and all the different diagnoses i had even though i reflect on my blueprint of past acheivementrs i was pleased with which do not inspire me any more. i use flower essences and oils to keep me and mood stabile so i do not compare myself to others this is becasue anything i attempted in the past i was overwhemed with and gave up on so i lacked consistency. i always put it down to the fact i was never validated by my parents then i got lost in the mental health system and never developed a strong identity. any way i understand schizoid; attention defict disorder; and insccure attachement and i have all three so i keep myself to myself

*This one landed immediately within me. Thank you for addressing the shame collage. *

Here stop giving a fk stop focusing on her your only hurting yourself love yourself choose you focus on you and if it makes you feel better tell your next partner you love about it😂

It only took me a week too get over my break up😂i choose me i love myself😊

Thank you, but how do you discover your core belief?

Woah, your voice was way too calming and peaceful 😂 I nearly fell asleep 💗

I’m hurting so bad right know..

My heart hurts so bad

Not only does your advise help but I can listen to you're voice all day

Great message :) I was always self monitoring, saying sorry and thank you too much, etc. I liked that meditation book called 30 Days to Stop Apologizing by Harper Daniels.

So helpful, thank you

I feel as if this also relates to the outside world as well. We only have so much control of our life circumstances and we shouldn’t beat ourselves up if our lives don’t look a certain way.

This is so great! I made my moving part a barge and I am the river. That thought is being carried away. To make it extra special the barge has a bunch of trash on it so I can see those unhelpful thoughts leaving down the river in the trash bags they need to be in!

great video, great advice. thanks

Using this as a new social experiment for getting better at empathy instead of just saying "You'll be alright" or "It's nothing big"

I was under an unbelievable amount of pain for months but now, almost 9 months after I’m finally doing better than I ever was. Much better than when I was in that relationship. It was something I never thought I’d be okay losing. Trust me, you will heal. It just takes time so be patient with yourself. But you will heal.

YOU ARE SO PRETTY

Very clear, thank you

Lovely to listen to. Thank you ❤

i'll come back for this comment when i'm healed🙏

Something that people say is useful in getting over a breakup is something on here titled…Some blokes guide to relationship breakups It’s not your usual get over her advice